Top 10: Software Development Jokes

Just like any profession, we have heard our fair share of software jokes. In fact, we have several in development right now. 

Our Top 10 Favorite Jokes: Software Edition

10: Honey, don't touch that code!

What happens when bees write software?

Bee-ware

9: Testy McTesterson

A software tester walks into a bar and orders: -1 beers, NULL beers, 9999999 beers, asdjfuio beers, and a turtle. The bartender fills the orders he can and tells the tester which orders he cannot fill.

A real user walks into the bar and asks to use the bathroom. The bar explodes.

8: Only Time Will Tell

I have a software development joke. It will be ready next week. Honest.

7: Click to Restart

Have you ever run across people who are like a software update? And when you see them you think, "not now".

6: Finding a Solution

A mechanic, an electrician, and a software developer were driving in a car. The car stops working. 

The mechanic says, "It must be a problem with the motor."

The electrician says, "It must be a problem with the ignition."

The software developer sits a while, and finally says, "Maybe we just need to get out and come back in?" 

5: Working Up an Appetite

How do software engineers eat their food?

In large bytes.

4: Getting Things Done

How many software developers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. That's a hardware issue.

Alternate answer: You are not working in agile methodology. Try asking the scrum master to call the janitor.

3: All the World's a Stage

All programmers are playwrights, and all computers are lousy actors.

2: UX or UY?

A user interface is like a joke. If you have to explain it, it's not that good.

1: Warning: Does Not Compute

A software developer walks into a bar and lights up a cigarette. 

The bartender looks up, aggravated, and says "Don't you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is bad for your health!"

The software developer replies, "I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors."